Change can be invited or thrust upon us, and dealing with either can be trying at best. Many women have graced us with their words of wisdom, so we've compiled a bit of advice on change, transition, and evolution—as our hope is that you find necessary motivation in these anecdotes and stories. (And here is more advice on career and living a creative life from six fearless Fold women.)
"For the longest time I stood in my own way. It's sort of a boring story but mostly I was in fear, in a total panic that there would be no way I could be a film director and be self-supporting. For years, I did all of this work adjacent to what I really wanted, which was to be an artist....Most recently, now that I am a director, it’s about fine tuning the vision, its so easy to self abandon no matter how much you are standing in your truth. I often have to ask myself, Is this ok? Is this the vision?" Read more from writer and director Rachel Fleit about her life evolution, and how she navigated and manifested change.
"It’s hard for many of us to admit when we’ve completely screwed something up. As women in particular, we carry not only the responsibilities of work and family life, but are expected to smile and be gracious and humble through it all. It’s bullshit, really. But the hardest part is wading through our own BS – the truths we’ve told ourselves in order to navigate our everyday existence." Read more from Jen CK Jacobs on divorce, ending a marriage, and the evolving journey of finding a sense of self amidst it all.
"I think it has to do with letting go of expectations and embracing what you have. This mindfulness practice has really helped me get through the last few years. When you let go of social pressures and should be's... you learn to embrace a messy but beautiful life, and that can be applied to everything, even to home." Read more about Chelsea Fuss's charming, intimate Portugal home, and how she built a life in her own time and on her own terms.
Aran Goyoaga on Cultivating Love in the Kitchen + Meringue Cake with Roasted Apples From Cannelle et Vanille Bakes Simple
"Set a humble table and eat beautiful simple food. Nothing has to be fancy. When you make yourself comfortable, your guests will feel comfortable."
"We read them stories about change makers throughout history, we tell them about people, today, who dedicate their lives to make a difference, but we also want them to know that we all need to work to make our country, and world, a better place. This is no time to stand on the sidelines and wait for someone to save us, we need to save ourselves. Doing something is better than doing nothing." Read more from arts and culture editor Nora Gomez-Strauss about how she incited change through running for local office for the first time—and won.
"And then right around now, at the cusp of 40 or just past it, we finally have a minute to sit back and breathe and look at building ourselves. The career is established, the kids are thriving, the marriage is trucking along...it's time for me (or it's time for you, in your case). But a lot of us don't like what we see." Read more from Fold contributor Raluca State about the necessary change of the just-turned-40 crisis and how to cope.
"You are not alone. Talk about it. The more I opened up, the more support I received. The more I let people know how I was feeling, the better they were able to assist me. In the beginning I was trying to be superwoman and do it all myself, and that is just not possible. It is such an emotional journey, and in my experience, hiding from the world only makes you feel more alone and sad." Read more from adoptive mother (at age 42) Rachel Daugherty on going from hope to hopelessness and back again.
And, in case you missed it, our wellness editor Lisa Levine taught us how to embrace change and reframe our mindset: "Reframing an unfortunate or unexpected situation to see it as a gateway to wisdom, growth, or even unforeseen opportunity feels much better than thinking life is conspiring against you. Steer yourself toward an attitude of flexibility and compromise instead of one that’s full of hopelessness and woe." Read more here.